I know you’ve been waiting. Yearning. Patiently crafting your 5-7-5 syllable tributes to everything that’s right about the South Carolina State Fair. Carnies, corn dogs and cotton candy – let ’em fly, people. Need a little inspiration? Here are the 2012 haikus and 2011 haikus. Meet you at the rocket!
those little donuts
fried dough and powdered sugar
mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm
Oh yes. The only thing better than a big donut is a bag of little tiny greasy ones!
Spandex-clad asses
Tobacco-stained smiles abound
Large Pronto Pup please!
BOOM!
‘Cry Havoc!’ and let
slip the dogs of the midway,
both Snoopy and Corn.
You never disappoint, Neal!
Fried elephant ears,
dusted with snow. Children gaze
and scream with delight.
I am screaming with delight, Scott!
recreational
vehicles Ho! set ’em up.
Carnies make the Fair
Moved to tears. Beautiful.
not going this year
kids are grown and I get sick
Dalys? Well, maybe.
Mmmm! Corndogs for Kevin!
If you agree that
Pay-One-Price should apply to
fair food, raise your hand
You. Are. Brilliant!!
Tube top and coasters
State Fair fashionista y’all!
Red-faced self expression.
Niiiiiiice!
Teets and Ass we pet
the donkey not amused
palm funk Fiske Fry time?
drops mic!
I miss my mother
She is not at the rocket
I am the rocket
Awww. I will meet you at the rocket.
Sausage, Coke, and fries
Ferris wheel spins round and round
Vomit on my shoes
urp.
young ones in stroller
what they see from so low
Halloween is not as scary
True dat!
Eyes closed. Ears, alive!
Machine noise intersperced
with yo-yo’d voices.
I can already smell the french fried mushrooms.
cash rolling in
hand over fist
none of it stays here
That’s why I eat Daley’s dogs. #local
Vinegar and Fries
Pronto puppin’ deep fried bliss
Where’s Julie Turner?
I think the official verb for the fair this year will be pronto-puppin’!
Golden and crispy
Juicy nitrate filled center
Daley Dog Goodness.
Mmmmm!
Red Bank, Sandy Run,
coming from the DMV.
Next stop: corn dog stand.
Lots of love for the corn dog this year. Poor turkey leg.
Color, lights, motion,
I watch in awe. Joyful Jules
gettin’ her Fair on.
You know it, lady-in-the-bathtub-game!
what comes first? the corn
dog or frozen banana?
either way, i win.
Amen, HP!
Do you like my new tie?
I just bought it yesterday.
Damn! Mustard stain, crap.
– From the “Mustard cycle”
Hold my turkey leg
I’m gonna win you a prize
I rule at squirt guns
Totally #winning!
Announcements precede
this fair arrives with warning,
fryolated arts.
Fryolated. Nice!
Got my swagger on
and flyn’ high at the fair
Big dogs can’t touch this
can’t stand on my feet
cause Crazy Mouse just killed me
dammit, please shut down that beast
On simple concrete
stands steel and light and thunder
a rocket evolves
zombie apocalypse
just as the State Fair begins
hmmm? brains on a stick!